So you’ve made it this far, and maybe you’re not convinced yet. “So what”, you say. “Where’s the PROOF?” Well, aside from the examples I’ve already given (you haven’t been paying attention, have you) this page is for you, the skeptic. Here on this page, I will present you with irrefutable, absolute proof that the Asian Man is screwed.
The Chang Attractiveness Matrix
I mentioned before that whereas maybe 10% of white guys are into Asian females, maybe more like 1% of white girls are into Asian guys. “So what,” says the skeptic. “It’s hard finding the right girl! It doesn’t matter if it’s 10% or 1% – if you find the right girl then everything is fine, so stop your whining!”. Obviously, Mr. Skeptic is bad at math. So I’ll put it in easy, graphical terms.
Take a brief look at Figure 1. I call this the Chang Attractiveness Matrix. It’s based on the standard Cartesian coordinate system. On the x-axis we have Physical Attractiveness – at a positive x, we have Beautiful or Handsome people, and at negative x, we have those that aren’t. On the y-axis, we have Mental Attractiveness – at a positive y, we have people who are fun to be with, who are interesting, who have a sense of humor. At a negative y, we have people who are boring, or even annoying. Note now how I’ve divided the CAM into zones. Zone I, representing people who are both Physically and Mentally Attractive, is the jackpot. (In reality Zone I probably represents much less than 25% of the population, but bear with me.)
Zone II represents marginally datable people. After all, it is a well-known fact that a guy is more willing to put up with a slightly annoying girl if she is blazing hot. This is the part of Zone II directly under Zone I. Conversely, a girl who is not terribly physically attractive may still be attractive if she is fun or interesting to be with, represented by the part of Zone II to the left of Zone I. Finally there is the big red Zone III, representing people who are neither Physically nor Mentally Attractive, or people who are somewhat Physically or Mentally attractive and yet so unattractive on the opposite scale that they are rendered un-datable. (Someone who is blazing hot and yet a total airhead, such as Paris Hilton or Jessica Simpson, falls into this category.)
Now, what does this have to do with the plight of the Asian man? Let us assume that one meets 100 new white people. Using the figures stated earlier, then, the Asian girl, having met 100 new white guys, might find that 10 of them are interested in her (namely Asian girls). These 10 people are likely to be randomly distributed across the CAM (Figure 2). Even with only 10 out of the 100, the random distribution is such that the 3 out of those 10 are datable. And the chances that at least 1 out of those 3 finds HER datable are pretty good, assuming she isn’t a deep Zone III person herself.
The Asian male, on the other hand, has to deal with Figure 3. As stated, out of the 100 white girls he meets, maybe one is interested in Asian men. As a result the Asian male is totally at the mercy of the CAM, and statistically, that 1 white girl is about 50% likely, if not more, to be in Zone III. Even if that 1 white girl is a Zone I person, there is no guarantee that she finds the Asian guy to be datable herself. The end conclusion is that as usual, the Asian male is screwed – not only is it harder for the straight Asian male to find somebody interested in Asians in general, it’s also less likely that said person will find them at all attractive.
The Dave Behavioral Paradigm
Strict math aside, careful analysis has revealed that Asians and whites just behave differently. After intense research into the motivations of two populations of humans – that is, the Asian guy and the white guy – we’ve managed to develop the Dave Behavioral Paradigms presented below. Click on a thumbnail to be brought to the full paradigm.
The Asian Asking-Out Simulator
An exciting new advance in artificial intelligence has made this resource possible. Thinking of asking that nice girl that you talk to all the time out on a date? Before you do, try this simulator to see what she’ll probably say to you!
The Dave Male-Female Attraction Equation
Newton’s formulation of the Law of Gravity was a pinnacle of Classical Physics. Likewise, I believe that the Dave Male-Female Attraction Equation represents a pinnacle of Classical Sociology. But Dave has gone even further to develop special cases (represented by the Yellowness Damping factor) important to our discussion of BAM. Perhaps this will lay the foundation for a formulation of a Special Theory of Asian Relativity one day.